Cocktails and Coaching

Sometimes you know what you want but you're not too sure how to achieve it... We all struggle with this at times so hopefully this model, or way of thinking will help you. The trick is to break it down into your  Vision ,  Goals  and  Strategy. When I was first told about this concept, it was explained to me as, the Vision is to win the war, the Goal is to win 3 battles and the Strategy is to attack first and don't surrender!! Although work can sometimes feel like a battle! I thought I'd bring it to life with an example of wanting to appear more like a leader to help with your next promotion - a real example that a friend recently came to me with... So let's start with  Vision ,  what is it that you want to achieve?  ie demonstrate that you're a leader . Next are your  Goals , try not to have too many but think about  what it is you need to do to achieve your ambition?  ie,1. Make decisions objectively 2. Give clear direction 3. Shape other people's ideas. And t

#QuoteOfTheDay: people would rather talk about their entire sexual history than how much they earn….! Tonight I went to an event in London on ‘Negotiating The Gender Pay Gap’ there were some really interesting facts about men earning 14.2% more than women doing the same jobs, and that male graduates tend to ask for a better starting salary than female graduates but the key for me is that 31% of people leave their jobs due to their salary. However, for a lot of companies, the cost of losing someone and having to recruit and train someone new – can often outweigh the cost of just rewarding the original person fairly to start with. A lot of people, regardless of gender, aren’t happy with their pay but don’t have the confidence to ask for a payrise. So here are the top tips I took away on negotiation: Be confident – Don’t apologise before you’ve even started talking ie ‘sorry to bother you’…. ‘I know you’re busy’….. instead start the conversation with ‘I’d like to have a meet

Why is it that who you work for and how they treat you can impact you so massively? I've had a number of managers over my 16 years experience of full time work. I know, I don't look old enough surely!!! I've had some managers that haven't been the best, but I'm fortunate enough to have had a handful that have been great. What I do know when I reflect, is that I have been happiest at work during the times I've worked for the great managers. So what is it that makes a person great to work for? I know everyone is different and we are all motivated in different ways, but these are some of the things that are key to me; They believe in you They give you direction They coach you when things could have gone better But also say well done when things go well They are someone you look up to and admire They help you recognise, and bring out your strengths I try really hard to make sure I'm the best manager I can be, I want to motivate people and have people come to wor

Have you ever met someone that you just don't trust, but you can't put your finger on exactly why?  I've recently heard of the concept that trust is an equation... Trust = Reliability + Credibility + Intimacy / Self Interest Reliability ... Do they do what they say they will? Are they consistent? And are they there when you need them? Credibility ... Do they have a track record? Are they an expert on the subject matter? Intimacy ... Are they open? Do they share about them-self? Are they honest? Do you know them personally? The interesting thing is that someone can have all of these qualities but Trust can be completely undone by the last element which is dividing all of that by Self Interest. Self Interest ... Are they political? Out for them-self? Just after one big goal? Their may be people where you can now absolutely pinpoint why it is that you don't trust them. But think about yourself, are there any elements that you need to address for others to trust you?

The key is for people to work hard because they want to do a good job for you, rather than because they fear you. To me it is really important that I lead by example... I want to be treated fairly so I treat people fairly too. That's not to say that I give people an easy ride. I have high expectations of people that work for me and around me, but I have even higher expectations of myself! I recently had a 17 year old come and work with me on work experience and he commented that we have a culture where people work hard because they don't want to let their teams and manager down rather than through fear. Which got me thinking...  What makes a good manager / leader? It's someone who: Doesn't make it personal  Makes decisions objectively Is honest  Is guided by internal moral standards Has self awareness  Demonstrates an understanding of own strengths and weaknesses Is good at disclosing about them-self Can help shape your ideas And I'd say my favourite... A leader ena

I recently wrote a blog about balance and how to find out what balance means to you... Which prompted a conversation with a friend on how does 'one' actually find balance?... My favourite cocktail is a Caipirinha... To make it, you just need Cachaca (white rum), lime, sugar and ice... The right balance of all and it tastes amazing... Get the balance wrong and it's really not good!! I work full time and have 2 lovely little girls who are always full of energy! And I try really hard to balance work and motherhood (plus have time to go out for cocktails with the girls every so often)! It is important to me that I am the best I possibly can be, at whatever I do, whether I’m at work or at home. I need to feel that I am the best possible version of me.  I love my job but I also love being a mum, as I said, I have 2 girls who are 2 and 5 - don’t get me wrong, it can be hard work coping with early morning wake ups and the terrible two's! But I don't believe I have to choos

I've learnt a lot about myself recently while spending a week at Telefonica University in Barcelona. I'm a fairly self aware person however the value of stopping, reflecting and gathering your thoughts is immense and I highly recommend it! While I was there I spoke to lots of people and the common theme that came out is the importance of balance. It is very personal and individual but whatever 'balance' means to you is worth exploring. For me, balance right now is about being successful at work and progressing my career but not at the expense of my family. For myself and my family, I want to create memories and I want to shape my two girls into wonderful people. True balance for me is recognising that me being successful at work compliments my ambitions for my family.  Questions you can ask yourself... Why do you get out of bed in the morning? (And not because your kids are jumping on top of you!!!) What are you passionate about? Are you proud of how you spend your time

I have spent time with, and heard from, some really inspiring people recently which has led me to reflect a lot about self talk. Whenever we really step out of our comfort zone, we talk to ourselves. But who's doing all the talking? The critic in you? Or your own personal cheerleader? Spend a few minutes to think about a time that you were brave.... What was your self talk? Were you in a positive or negative mindset? And how did you overcome any negative self talk? I believe that if you have a positive mindset then you are much more likely to see positive results. But even more than just thinking positively, think about things that you know and believe are true. We all get nervous, especially when we need to be brave. A great tip that I heard from Executive Coach Sarah Brummitt was that getting nervous is just our bodies way of getting the adrenalin pumping so our body is ready to perform at it's highest possible level. I love this, as it really encapsulates th