Cocktails and Coaching

How do you do it all? How do you not burnout? I often get asked these questions, so I wanted to share my tips. Prioritise . Yes now vs not now! This is something I do every single day Have non negotiables that you live by e.g. logging off at a certain time or not working at the weekend (this really helps you prioritise) Outsource what you can. We don't feel guilty paying someone to cut our hair, so why feel guilty paying someone to clean our house? Trust : That others can do things as good or better than you. This helps with delegation Choose gratitude . Even on the busiest and stressful days, challenge yourself to think of just 1 thing you're grateful for Make space for what gives you energy every week - for me it's helping people so sharing content / coaching / mentoring all tick this box for me Choose if you give something 0/10 or 10/10 . Life's too short for 7 out of 10's! Spend 5 mins every day doing something that makes you smile . Read a book, cuddle your ...

Have you thought about your brand and what your brand statement is?  I've got 5 simple steps to help you write your brand statement in just a few minutes. Let's start by thinking… What is a brand?  ·        A brand is what people say about you after you've left the room . ·        It's how people describe you. ·        Your words, actions, decisions and body language all impact your brand. But remember, it's not just about reality … how people perceive you could be different to reality - but it has a massive impact on your brand. So grab a pen and paper and write down what comes to mind when I ask you the following 5 questions: 1.       W hen people think of you w hat words do you think come to mind? 2.        How would you like people to describe you? o    It could be innovative, respectful, caring, inspiring, fun, genuine, energet...

Like all parents, 2 months ago my world got thrown upside down with the reality of having to homeschool 2 young children while working full time! It's definitely not been easy, but guess what?... 2 months on and we're all surviving! The kids may not have learnt any new times tables! And my husband and I often spend time working after the kids are in bed. But… We now have a family dinner EVERY night (which never used to happen) and last week my girls scored me a 9 out of 10 for being a good mum/teacher! #winning (It had been a particularly good day!) Recently I was interviewed by Donna Elliott on the topic of 'pandemic parenting' , and I wanted to share with you all my top tips. You can also watch the 30 minute interview on YouTube here. Tip 1. Organise, diarise but be realistic My husband and I send each other meeting invites so we know who is 'in charge' of the kids, it helps us to be organised, but we also know that we won't stick t...

Imagine this - you're out for dinner, you've eaten way too much food and are full! But, the desert menu comes and you see sticky toffee pudding  on the menu, and guess what… You find room!! (Well I always do anyway!) For me helping people is like that! I could be up to my eyeballs - deadlines, presentations, meetings. But someone asks if I've got 5 minutes to help them and my answer is always yes! I've come to realise that not only is it my 'sticky toffee pudding' but it's also where I get my energy from. So whether it's coaching, mentoring, writing a blog or just a quick conversation helping someone, if I can find time for that, it'll give me a boost of energy to tackle the rest of my day. So my question to you… What’s your 'sticky toffee pudding’?  And once you’ve found it, approach it with as much passion and commitment as you can.

Are you a glass half full or a glass half empty kind of person? I'm definitely a glass half full person, however, 3 weeks ago, like everyone else my world got turned upside down….  Faced with the thought of juggling homeschooling our 6 and 9 year olds while me and my husband both work with the unknown of what was going to happen over the coming weeks and months,  my anxiety levels were extremely high …  But the feeling I had more than anxiety was  guilt !!  What right did I have to feel anxious  when others were in far worse situations than me, I'm still working, we're all healthy, I have a garden, my kids are old enough to entertain themselves… I felt I had no right to feel anxious. Then 2 things happened. 1st -  I have some amazing friends who I vented to… who didn't judge, just listened, sympathised and assured me my feelings were 'normal'. Told me I had the 'right' to feel these feelings and said I didn’t need to feel guilty. ...

Have you ever wondered how some people just seem to have a knack of being able to persuade you to do something? (like stay for just one more drink!!!)…   If you want to either learn how to influence and persuade people or maybe to just be more aware of people trying to influence you, then keep reading as there are 4 styles you need to be aware of. I've split this blog into 4 parts so that I can keep to my usual short and hopefully sweet style!  This is part one with the next three to follow.. In each part I'll share the style and then bring it to life for you… I've given the same example for each one to show that you really can use any of the 4 styles depending on who you're trying to influence… I've used an example that I'm faced with day in, day out in my job but you really can spin it for absolutely anything. Persuading This type of influencing is called persuading …  This is a good one to use when you are seen as the expert and you have...

Are you the type of person who gets on a plane and keeps your head down? Or are you the type of person who strikes up a conversation with the person sat next to you? For those who know me, you'll know that I'm definitely the kind to strike up a conversation! And I'm glad to say I did this just a few weeks ago. Picture this - I'm sat there reading my 'TED talks' book (which I highly recommend by Chris Anderson) and the person sat next to me asks me if I'm doing a talk? 'Yes' I say, 'I'm talking to 60 people at a Women In Tech Sales event next week' to which her response was 'Amazing… I'm a professional speaker'! Now, there was no way I could pass up this opportunity so I asked her for all her top tips and was soon sat there scribbling them all down in my book. Imagine how happy I was when a week later I did my presentation, having weaved in ALL of her top tips, and received some fantastic feedback. So let m...

If you want to know how to build a strong team then you could go on a course for a few days, you could read a 300 page book or… You could just take the advice from my eight-year-old daughter! The other morning I told her that I had a team meeting and I was thinking about what to do in it. ‘ What do you want to get from the meeting? ’ she said (just the question alone surprised me if I’m honest, bearing in mind she’s 8!) ‘ I want my team to figure out how they can work really well together ’ I said. Her instant response was ‘ Communicate more! ’ So I told her ‘ I also want everybody to say what a great job my team is doing ’ her response… ‘ Believe in yourselves ’ At that point I thought I’d pass her a pen and paper and ask her to write down her top tips… She thought 5 points would be good so here they are! 1. Communicate more 2. Believe in yourselves 3. Share your worries 4. Tell someone when you need help 5. Decide together I’m obviously bias but I think that’s prett...

Do you ever find yourself getting frustrated with what's going on around you? Perhaps there are some big changes happening at work, or maybe there are things that you're not happy about at home. I often talk to people about the fact that you can't change or control what other people do, you can only change and control your own actions but this takes it one step further. It's called your circle of influence. Think of something you're not happy about and want to focus on. Then draw a large circle and inside that circle draw another smaller circle in the middle. The inner circle represents your circle of influence - in here, write down all the things that are frustrating you about the situation that you can influence. Then, put all the things that are frustrating you that you can't influence in the outer circle, in other words, they're outside your circle of influence . You can then see really clearly what you can and can't co...

People often point out that I don't seem to get stressed. And it's true… it could be due to the fact that I'm a very positive person or that it's just in my nature to stay calm, however I'm currently reading the book ' The Chimp Paradox ' and I now believe I don't get stressed because I'm happy making decisions. One of the items in the book is about the natural instinct that we all have, which is; when we are faced with an uncomfortable situation or decision we either Fight , Flight or Freeze . For example, if we're asked to do something that stretches us out of our comfort zone (see my blog Oh Pants! ) a lot of people will say no which is the ' flight '. Or you disagree with what someone is saying and you end up having an argument with them which is the ' fight '. Or you're put on the spot and you completely forget what you wanted to say which is the ' freeze '. So, I've heard of fight, flight or freeze like m...

It's been years since I drank a Woo Woo but I have to say it's an old favourite of mine! It's a cocktail made simply of vodka, peach schnapps and cranberry juice (I personally recommend adding a squeeze of fresh lime too). I think it's a pretty well known cocktail in the UK, however my US colleagues gave me some pretty strange looks when I started talking about woo woos recently so perhaps it's not a universal cocktail (or maybe they just think I'm just a strange (but brilliant) brit!!)- but I'd recommend you try it wherever you live!.... This week I did a 'Strenghts Finder' exercise and one of my own personal strenghts is 'Woo'.... The definition being ' loves the challenge of meeting new people and winning them over. Derives satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection with someone .' And it's true - I love networking, meeting new people, building relationships and 'winning people over'. So for anyone ...

Have you ever asked someone a question and as soon as you've asked it, you're thinking of a follow up question? Or you start thinking about your own experiences of what they're talking about? Or worse still you start judging them?!.... Take a look at my blog#nojudging …. If you're human! You'll have answered yes to at least one of the above, if not all of them - and this is absolutely normal. But. Are you having a valuable conversation and both getting the most out of it? I've heard of active listening before but I was recently on a course where I had to really do it, and trust me, it was exhausting! The key with active listening is to: Properly listen! Switch off your inner voice Just be in the moment of the conversation Don't let yourself get distracted Truly  listen to what the other person is saying Listen to the phrases they're using And tune into how they're felling when they talk. It's har...

I have a moto in life with my friends which is #nojudging and I absolutely love it and mean it!! I work full time, have 2 cheeky girls and a husband to look after!! I have got a good job, do a volunteer role plus I write the odd blog when I can! So sometimes people say to me 'how do you do it all?' … Of course it's always quite nice to hear that (I am human after all) but I'm also really conscious that I don't want to put an image out there that other people judge themselves against, there is enough pressure out there without me adding to it! I was recently talking to someone who's been offered a new job and they started doubting themself… 'Would they actually be able to do the job?' , 'Should they be working full time when they have a young child?' , ' What if it wasn't the right role for them?' … when I told them that I've had, and have similar feelings I was shocked to see that they were actually surprised to hear me...

If you're anything like me, you start January thinking ' how can this year be 'my year' ', you may want to aim for a promotion , be seen as a high performer or view this year as your 'career accelerator year'. I believe that to feel like you're achieving great things you need to be really clear on your goals and have clear objectives . If you're a people manager you'll also probably see January as the month to nail everyone's objectives and have a plan for the whole team. You can use this tool to write your own work objectives, help your team write theirs or plan how you're going to achieve your career goals. The idea is to split your objectives or goals into the following 3 areas: Objective Strategy Tactics The problem with just writing an objective and no more is that sometimes it can be so big that you can't actually measure if you're on track and you don't know what steps you need to take to achi...

After spending 11 years at the same company. I recently took the huge decision to leave and join Adobe… Adobe want to be known as a company 'who conducts good interviews' but are 'difficult to get through' and I have to say that I loved their interview process…  Not sure what that says about me!!! I had 5 interviews over the space of a month and it's led me to want to share  my   top 2 interview tips. For me there were 2 things that I spent time prepping for and I believe they could give you the edge when you're preparing for your next interview… 1.        Think about how you want to come across 2.        Plan questions that you want to ask 1.        How do you want to come across? A lot of people focus on what questions they think they're likely to be asked and therefore how to respond. But when you really think about it,  what are the odds of you acc...

Recently I phoned a colleague to ask one small question... And before I knew it we were on the phone for 90 minutes! It's amazing how powerful it can be to just ask someone (if really care about the answer) "How are you?" …. One thing that came out of this conversation (and many others I've had over the years), is how much time and effort we tend to put into work and how we want to be thought of as a high performer, but there are also so many other elements in our lives that we perhaps don't focus on… If you put all your effort into just one aspect of your life and something outside of your control massively impacts it then you could be left feeling empty. Is it better therefore to invest your time into a number of different areas of your life, so that if one element is impacted, it's not the end of the world as you have other areas to prop you up? So what are the different areas? The way I look at it is through these 8 areas, the first 5 are quit...

I was on my first panel at an event recently and I was asked "What advice would you give your younger self?"   It really made me think… At first I interpreted it as - what do I wish I'd done differently . But I am a firm believer about not having regrets and I have the positive mindset that everything happens for a reason.   So I then switched the question in my head to "What advice was I once given that I really listened to"   I often seek advice from other people and I soak up lots of different perspectives on how to do things… But the one piece of advice I was given many years ago that I love was "Only follow advice that is true to you, and feels right to you"   The reason I loved this advice is because I'm quite an open person, so it's really important to me that people don't question whether they can trust me or if I'm genuine or not. So if I follow other people's advice it's really important that it's a...

Imagine you had a problem that you wanted to solve , change or focus on, and I told you that after answering just 5 or 6 questions you could walk away with a clear action plan having committed to what you would do today, to make a difference!   Well, today I wanted to bring to life the GROW model which does exactly that… Unfortunately I can't claim it as my own! But I do use it all the time… It's a great tool to help shape the conversations that you have with your team or mentees. Or you can use it to help figure stuff out for yourself…   One of my team saw these questioned and joked that it forms the basis of every conversation they have with me! (You're welcome!!!!) But I love the idea that you can go from being really unclear about something, and by just answering a few questions suddenly you're really clear about what you need to do and how to do it!   So, step one, is think of something you're not happy with or want to change or solve… This co...

Have you ever wanted to make a  difference  and  change  something? But just found it incredibly hard? Often, we think that we just need to build  awareness  and that will do the trick, but is awareness really enough? I'm the Chair of the Women's Network at O2 and I want to play my part in making O2 a more inclusive place, where people's talents and contribution are recognised and celebrated, regardless of gender. Enabling people to progress and succeed at work. Until now, much of my approach has focused on raising awareness of the challenges facing women in the workplace – in the hope that by highlighting the issues, we’d get closer to achieving real change. But then I heard an analogy from Toby Mildon at the BBC recently about how to make real change happen – either on a personal level or more broadly and it got me thinking…   Sometimes you can be  aware  that you are overweight. You...